Ka Hoku o Hawaii, Volume XXXIV, Number 27, 1 Nowemapa 1939 — Untitled [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

Koko-Nuts hinl to all the wuy to Honohilu to fsnd out what a gre;it fisirērbiāh"Cō\mty Attorney .Mai iiu Peuee is. I>i<l you ever hear <if u bueket fish? Well, Penee i nught tlie biggest oue of the season and has pleiity of \vitnesses to provt i it. Sinoe that eventful liis favorite song is "The 01d Oak-t-n BiKket." Japanese sentry re*used to !et a collector aboard the Yakumo at Honolulu because he didn't have a coat on. Perhaps the poor feliow had only one and it was at the eleaners. DESERT POME NO. 47 On the fog-bound desert All wet and forlorn, I* j)oor Willie Wuffle— His ear had no horn. MAVBE SHE'S JUST AIR-MINDED

Uttte Streamtines, the offie« witdcat ( says she is going to apply for a job as elevator operator irt that new skyscraper the pubiisher of the loeal morning daily says he is goin g to buiid i*» the near future. She Bays the mommg daSty keeps her up 1n the air mo<t of the t>me, ar>yhow. S.S. H \\V UI H\S LARGE LIST --Newspaper headline. ls she listing to port or starboard? Accordir>g to !atest news dispatches, Germany and Russia pian to carve Turkey. A !ot of Americans wlll do the same thing next month. sitnik>: As yf>ung looking m as BiUie Burke, War Precaution: Ail hightanders in Scotland vvili please refrain from playing the bagplp« during air raids. "Turkt?yturter" ls haiae 0f a new "liot tiog" recently iu L'liicag<>. Su< h a uauw would b»J more appropriat<» !f th<> manu^a* 4 - turers usv'vi bcan& instead of turkey. CHINESE SPL.IT IS COMiNG T0 HEAD SHORTLY,—Head!ng in Japanese New s paper. Those Chinese so)diers wjth the broadswords must be in the front line again. BUUL-ET|N

•T?u» <iiusau ! īn Hoaoiulu ts «o liott«?r ilmii it is in Hoiiolulu." BOY FRACTURES ARM 1N ACCIDENT — Nev*spape head lIM. ; lt w©uld hav* be*n h*v« 3o«e thi« vvtth«ut th« s,c<l 4nt* Tn»v 10 tr«diUo» KMi? FVrs\an «IP? :tri"ī> ('d ht>tv Wodno-i.lay 1« a »hov»tfr of r»in, bul don*t say auv(h[tig u< hUu nlunH !t— setutv£ a 3Utk <►« th<e s«fe J<nm &•(!>• R«n<t m*> vUtt Hi?o «oon, »ocor<Jir>9 tc E4di* r*man<|fx. Sally wiH mi of f*m he"* t;u.-.r-Kiurn wll!" jmt »15 »'\tn< w i'fkV i>«v this . '.V W< i iu»w s (o thr i jVH,tī«K rv;!'ii■■ V t'«- <-r.:t- caili<« i HYMN gF HAT£ ! A yqr w« H»tt | !c Ōlmme S »

The kine of mooch#rs And bo!d panhandlers, H'e tays for ūs Along the street and mooches dimes "So he ean «at," But most times we're }nclined to think He takes our dime To buy a drink, Tlio 1 >ulco <>!' \\\'!Miigton gavo polioii aii a\vful lul;ing at the «»f WaU'i-īou. but iioliody sro::is to takc into i»onsideration the fapt that old Nappy \va« only half Wollinjrton's size. SOURPUSS SAM SĀYS: ā"We usua!ty have un- , usua| weather at this time of the year, but it way to keep the sun shiniing is to a!ways carry your umbretla w?th you." A Sootohnian oneo disoovere<3 *a poor little l>oy oryitijr heea\ise he'd lost a penny in llie dark —so he pive hini a niaU'h. FOOLISH QUESTION NO. 9.707'2 "ls that your dog" I see you leading around every day?" DON'T LET THAT STOP YOU, «ALLY S;i 11 y Kand. ■ nored fan daticPr, went hwke at the San Fr»nclseo fair and has Ihhmi foroed iiKo hankn»ptry. Tlie ret*eiver took her last striuu of heads thīs week and Tioiv she wants to eome to Hilo but the poor £irl a thing to ■weaī." We onee knew a eo!umnīst who was so narrow-minded he could look through a keyhote with both eyes. Waiula WaflfleiPon is so dumh she spent an honr the other dny hefore Uie niirror trying to find out how she lookwl with her eyes shut. THE HORRORS OF WAR thi« country gets lnto another war wtth Germany 60meb0dy will havif to ao to the troubft again of finding new names for hamburger and 6auerkraut> L|MM6R.LICK There onee was a mald of Slam, Who s:iid to her lorer, yo\ing Kiani.

"If you kiss uie, of course You will havo to tlse force— Bui kno\vs you are stronger than I am." We uriderstanct therc Is a spinst«r lady in this town who i» »o sanctimonious «he aiway< teav«« the room when her. canar/ i« takiU bath. Jaj)tinese uuvy band plajed a iu.i; iu.n*i ou īts coQccrt progr&m rhe othec eveniug. And ail the Uiue we ihought the Mikado"s ships were here on a good-wil! visit. Uttie Streamiines says her d«nti*t »s wonderfui apd that h« aiways fiiis hej* teeth with great pains. Aiu>tUer ueeded iuveutiou is au inMruu»ent Uuu wiil enable you to lell whether ttie pretty giri ou the wharf is wāviug at you or the pas.seu«er staudiug at the raii besi<ie you. And &o endeth th« dirty work.